feed me antidepressants;

school's gonna start tomorrow. i've never felt any day more depressing than today. the meridian boys are not only in the same school but class as well. when they are lost in class, they help each other in work. they have each other during breaks to have some fun and laughter. they have each other to talk to during lessons. after school, they can hang around in school together before heading home together.

as for me, i made a mistake to not join them as a meridian boy. i'm not a loner but i'm just very selective of friends. perhaps i've grown too attached to the meridian boys and refuse to let any other friends come into my life. i have nobody to crap with during breaks, i hesitate asking for help from my classmates, i rush for the gates once school ends. i need the meridian boys badly. i have nobody. the meridian boys are same frequency with me and it's hard to find anyone with the same frequency as me.

i spent the whole day at home thinking about all this shit. it sucks so badly. maybe it's because i spent the past week out of home studying and alot of time with leon. so staying at home today just feels weird and depressing. i seriously haven't adapted to school yet but the promos and everything is thrown to me already. if i should retain and meridian boys promote, it will be worse. i'll be really all alone already. why am i feeling this way?

I REALLY MISS...

Leon:
We are crazy boys. We always make it somehow.

Pam:
Many different roads to choose,
for the strength to make it through,
but it was always there in you.