slacked the whole day here at lynn girl's. anyways, life is fucked up. i got no fucking school, i don't know what i wanna do, i'm lost and stuck. i got no direction in life now. i'm different from others, i'm not perfect anymore, i'm not normal too. everything's just wrong. i will soon be despised, when others start doing big things, i'm still stagnant. people progress, i'm still. ah, fucked up.

people say it's okay if i cannot survive as a peasant in the small town coz now i'm moving to be the king of a village. so what if i really become a top student in poly? i'm still a year behind, still that loser. when the boys enter NS, i'll still be in the second year of a polytechnic or something. sucks.

being 17 last year was one of the few golden years a teenager have to maximise education opportunities. however, i stupidly rotted the year away and wasted my time. right now it's worse, everyday my brain grows lazier. i pass day by day not absorbing new knowledge but just witness time fly past before me.

it's fucked up, very fucked up. that button inside of me has been hit once again. fuck it. well, i know what to tell my relatives when chinese new year comes. oh hello, i'm a loser who wasted a year and have no idea where i'm going next but one thing for sure is that even if i finish uni or whatever next time, i'll be a year older than majority. wow.